20.

20.  October 23, 2018

My day started at 5:30 am.

I wasn’t sure why, but everything just felt different. Normally, when Tuesday rolls around I tend to sleep in, but today I practically jumped out of bed. Despite the fact that it was raining, I still got up, got dressed and went out to finish the thing that I have been putting off for so long. It was strange for me but I decided to just go along with it since I felt restless and needed some fresh air.

While I was walking to the academic advisement center it had dawned on me; today is my birthday. How could I forget? I turned my phone on and saw the flood of Happy Birthday messages from my family and friends and I started to reflect back on myself. (I know, I’m sounding a little too dramatic but hear me out!) For the past 20 years, I have neglected putting myself as my top priority. All of the times that I have stayed in bed on my days off procrastinating, watching Netflix; thinking that I was taking care of myself. I wasn’t.

Now I’m not saying that I just “woke up a different person”. As much as I wish that I could change everything over night, I know that the process is much more difficult than that. I just realized that if I want to be anywhere close to the person that I want to be, I cannot stay the same. I have wasted almost half of my life being too afraid to do anything; whether that be dancing, singing obnoxiously, sharing my writing, or speaking in public, and I am tired of it. There are so many things that I want to do but those little thoughts and fears in the back of my mind hold me captive. But not anymore.


Hello to whoever is reading this! I decided to share my journal entry from this morning as a way to open up a bit more since there are quite a handful of you now. ( Technically there are only 6 of you guys right now but I am more than grateful that you have all stuck by me! 🙂 ) I still haven’t decided what I am going to do for my birthday yet, but if I do anything I will probably post it on my Instagram which is linked on my home page. Thank you so much for reading and I will be back very soon.

much love,

J’Anne ❤

Rainy Days

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I’ve never particularly liked rainy days, but that doesn’t mean that I hate them either. I suppose it just depends on how I’m feeling that day. Sometimes I stay inside, and either watch Netflix or catch up on some homework. Other times, I see these rainy days as perfect photo ops. I also like to take these opportunities to take some time and reflect on myself and get my thoughts together. Continue reading “Rainy Days”

Short Story Series

Processed with VSCO with p5 presetWhenever I have an idea, I tend to jot it down in journals, notebooks, or on random scraps of paper, no matter how good or bad, and then never look at it again. I have so many scenes and scenarios written down, that as I was going through them again I realized that some of them would actually make interesting stories. I’ve decided to share a couple of them on here , and who knows, maybe I will continue on with one of them. I hope you all find something that inspires you this weekend, and please look forward to my next post.

J’Anne Alexandra

 

 

Morning Thoughts

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There is just something about taking an early morning walk that makes me feel happy to be alive.  The smell of the dewy air; the way that sunlight filters through the tops of the trees. Even the way that the sky looks after it has just rained. Everything.   Every morning I get to witness how beautiful campus is whenever it  isn’t crowded with the constant hustle and bustle of people trying to rush to their classes.

It’s funny actually because I’ve never really thought about how people are so eager to get somewhere, that they miss the beauty around them. Now I completely understand if you are 20 minutes late to your class because you decided to take a detour and get Starbucks, we’ve all done it. It’s just that I feel like people miss out on so much when they have their nose buried in their phone, or when they have their eyes glued to the sidewalk in order to avoid eye contact with strangers.

I guess that’s it for now, I just thought that I would share my thoughts for the day. Thank you so much for taking the time to read.

Much Love,

J’Anne